If you’ve recently been dumped and have shared your grieving stories with friends and colleagues, you’ve probably noticed something in common in all of your advice. “Stay away from your boyfriend” or better yet “ignore him if you want to get him back.” Oddly enough, even online counselors advise the same thing: turn around, disappear from the scene, etc.
But it can seem very confusing to someone who hasn’t done anything like this before. How can you ignore a loved one, especially when you want to get them back? If you are as confused as I think you are, please read the following tips as they might help you understand this tip:
• A division hits you where it hurts the most: your ego. You just can’t face rejection and that too from someone you loved so much. So the normal tendency is to beg, plead, or even stalk your ex boyfriend, just to tell him how wrong his decision was to leave you and make him understand.
• Do you really know what you are doing? You are trying to restore your wounded ego. Once you get it back, you ‘think’ it can make you feel confident once again. You will no longer go around feeling and looking like a loser.
• What do these gestures of despair mean to your ex boyfriend? In addition to fully enjoying the extra attention she’s getting, she’s drawing very wrong conclusions about yourself. When someone is bullied day after day, they obviously think that you are a clingy and desperate soul, completely incapable of taking care of yourself! Sorry, this is the way the cookie has always fallen apart. You can’t do anything about the way people think and come to conclusions.
• On the other hand, when you give your ex boyfriend a deliberate and determined fault and refuse to contact him, no matter how tempted you are, the signal you are giving is that he is a loser and not you. While you wait to be pursued, any deviation from your expectations puts you out of commission.
• Reflect on your silence, mainly because your posture is very safe and decisive. Obviously, he’s not used to seeing this side of you. And the more he thinks about the matter, the more he realizes your worth. He wouldn’t want to be a loser either.
• Although this entire process may initially seem pointless, it has been proven time and again that giving your ex boyfriend a gentle nudge is a surefire way to get him back.
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