Stephen’s heart is in the right place. He really cares about her girlfriend, but he seems to continually let her down. As much as Stephen tries to express his deep feelings and love for his girlfriend, his efforts often fall short.
You often feel disappointed and frustrated. Stephen is worried that his girlfriend will break up with him and find someone else who can love her the way she wants to be loved.
He confides in a friend: “I don’t know how to love her!”
If you are in a love relationship or in a marriage and you feel that your attempts to show your love for your woman are not going as expected, you are not alone.
Many men find it difficult to love their women the way they want to be loved. You may find yourself racking your brain looking for a better way to express your love for the special woman in your life.
When you have an idea, it can seem like a risk to act on it. What if she doesn’t like it and you spent all the time and money to make it happen? What if you end up looking like a fool?
Even when you can think about how you can show your woman how much you love her, concerns like these can keep you from taking the steps to carry out your plan.
The bottom line here is this: when you don’t regularly show your love to your woman, she has to guess how you feel. Even if you’ve told her that you love her and that she’s important to you, she’ll probably want to hear this more than once or twice and on special occasions!
Expressing love and appreciation for each other is an essential component of a healthy love relationship or marriage.
Try these tips to enlighten your woman by loving her the way she wants to be loved…
This may seem too obvious, but I have to remember it anyway. If you have no idea how his woman wants to be loved, be willing to ask her.
Even if she’s the type of person who likes surprises, chances are she’ll also like surprises that are preferable to her.
Find the courage to ask your woman a question like this…
“What words, actions, gestures, or gifts would help you feel special and loved?”
Invite her to list anything and everything, with no limits allowed. Encourage her to dig deeper into this question.
Perhaps he would like you to take on more responsibilities around the home or childcare, for example. Maybe she would love to be treated to a sensual spa night at home with you giving her the massage. Or it could be that she’d just like to hear you tell her more often that she’s beautiful (without you asking).
#2: Really listen and move on.
When your wife gives you this information, focus and listen. If you’re not sure what she’s talking about, ask her, “Please tell me more.”
She might ask you the same question about how you want to be loved. If so, be open, honest, and specific. Give him the benefit of “insider information” like the one you just received.
Now is the time for you to move on.
I do not advise you to force yourself to say or do something that does not come from your heart. Let your love for her be your motivation… even if this is something new and a little uncomfortable for you.
If you’re not used to doing whatever you choose from your request list, you can set reminders for yourself. You could even use a cell phone or email calendar to help with this.
Even if your budget and time are tight, you can still more clearly express to your woman that you love and treasure her. Genuine words and meaningful gestures can be very powerful.
When you asked your wife to tell you how she wants to be loved, she probably felt special. Your question showed her that you really care about her. Then, by doing some (or all) of these things, you show your love even more.
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