Why does my ex say he loves me but they won’t get back together?

Ex-boyfriend giving you mixed signals? Does he call you one day saying that he still has feelings for you, but ignores you the next day when you call him back?

Does your ex keep telling you that he loves you, even though you’re broken? And yet every time you suggest getting back with him, does he suddenly run in the opposite direction?

Your situation is much more common than you think. At this point, your ex boyfriend may seem or act emotionally in conflict with you. He will tell you that he is confused, that he wants to spend time alone, or that he “needs some space” to fix things. In reality, however, something very, very different is happening. What if you want your ex back? You need to recognize exactly what it is.

Reasons why your ex still loves you after the breakup

Relationships are full of deep-seated feelings. The emotional ties you felt for your boyfriend were deep and they were deep for him as well. Because of this, your ex won’t let you go at once. It’s so much easier for him to let you go bit by bit, because he still has residual feelings for you.

So yeah, your ex boyfriend might still be in love with you, even after breaking things down. This would be the reason why he still calls you, texts you, or fills your email inbox on a daily basis. However, at the same time, he’s not ready to get back together yet. Keep pushing him to reconcile, and you may find that your ex is drifting further and further away.

This is where you try to walk that fine line … you try to maintain that delicate balance between staying in touch with your ex without scaring him off. However, what you don’t realize is that you’re actually doing yourself no favors here. And in most cases, you are actually prolonging the amount of time that you and your boyfriend will be apart.

Why won’t your ex come back to you right now

This cat and mouse game that your ex is playing with you right now is designed to accomplish one thing: keep you spinning. Your boyfriend wants to have his cake and eat it too: he would like you to stay and wait for him while he goes out and about with other people, and otherwise enjoys being single again.

That’s why your ex says he loves you, it’s because he does, but also because he wants you to have HOPE. Ideally, she’d love for you to sit idly by as her backup plan, in case she can’t find another girlfriend who’s better. What if it does? Suddenly, he doesn’t love you that much anymore or stops calling you altogether. That is when he will tell you that his feelings are ‘just not the same’, and that is when you will lose your ex forever. All because you sat down passively dealing with your breakup instead of being proactive about it.

What to do when your ex boyfriend says he loves you

When your ex starts telling you how much he still cares about you, that’s the exact moment you should walk away. The more you push forward when revealing your true feelings, the more you should step away and keep some distance between yourself and your ex-lover.

This is not because you are playing, it is actually the opposite. You’re letting your boyfriend know that he can’t have both – he can’t have the friendship and companionship of still having you around while maintaining the freedom of being single. Don’t give him the security of knowing that you still love him while he’s playing the field or isn’t 100% committed to you.

Tell your ex that yes, you love him, but that you can’t go on living half a relationship. Let her know that it’s better if you both went your separate ways, because she can’t keep hearing how much you love them and don’t want to get back together again.

Do this and you will force your ex boyfriend to make a decision. You are making him choose between having them all or not having any of you at all. And while this may sound harsh and can be a bit scary? It’s actually the only thing that will make your ex realize they want you back, rather than risk losing you to someone else.

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