How to Get a Girl to Say “I Do” – How to Seal the Deal When Asking Women Out

The average guy wonders how to get a girl to say “yes” to a date request – and the question itself has him shaking in his boots. The thought of rejection can cause a guy not to ask the question or even approach the girl he likes. And a lot of rejections can be quite off-putting, to say the least.

There is hope, however. Improving your batting average in the dating game is as simple as doing things right, and that goes for everything from how you ask a girl out. Here are some tips to improve your chances of getting a “yes”.

How to Get a Girl to Say “Yes”: Don’t Ask, Invite

In the presence of an attractive girl, guys can turn into cowards – maybe not obviously, but in subtle ways. Suddenly we’re on our toes, making sure everything we say is right, trying our best to be “gentlemanly” and polite, and asking for a date in the faint hope that she’ll agree.

The problem is that “asking” can lead directly to a “no!” In case you didn’t know, women love confidence. One of the best times to show it off is when you ask a woman out on a date – “ask” is the key word here.

Instead of asking a question, such as “Would you like to meet for coffee?”, turn the request into a statement, such as “Shall we meet for coffee this Saturday” or “I’m going to check out this exhibit at the museum of natural history on Friday; you must come along.” Tell her your intentions instead of submissively seeking her permission to spend time with her.

Asking a woman out this way accomplishes two things. One, you are subtly establishing yourself as a high-value leader who is demonstrating approval, rather than putting a girl on a pedestal and giving your all the power. You are allowing it to become part of your exciting lifestyle, to get a “peek” into the life of an awesome guy who has a lot of cool stuff going on.

The second thing is that you’re projecting confidence, showing her that your world won’t end if she loses her relationship with you. You have enough interesting things to do that you’ll just go alone or find another (perhaps more interesting) girl to go to if things don’t work out with this one.

Remember this: when a girl feels like you have options, she realizes that you are a desirable guy to be around – and that’s what makes her say “yes” when you ask her out.

Be as specific as possible

So hopefully you’ve had at least a brief conversation with the woman before asking her out. You may have discovered at least one or two mutual interests, which is a great basis for deciding on a meeting place. Or, if you haven’t delved into their mutual interests yet, you’re interested enough in her to make drinks or a cup of coffee.

In any case, when you ask a woman out, don’t just say “we should go out sometime” and leave the date content vague and up for interpretation – specifically mention a place. You take the lead by knowing exactly where to go.

You should know the best cafes, bars, restaurants and parks (great for simple first date walks) in the city. If you’re not familiar with them, make sure you actually have a life and are going out enough to meet them.

Spend some time each week to check out new locations and events. Whether you go with friends or visit these places alone, you’re doing something that will prove invaluable to your love life – you’re becoming a walking encyclopedia of interesting and fun things to do. You’ll never again be the boring guy who only takes girls out to dinner and movies (which is cool when you’re in the relationship stage, but sucks for a first date).

Not only that, but women will appreciate that you know how to take the lead and show them a good time. They hate it when guys are indecisive or can’t come up with half a decent date idea. Demonstrate your knowledge of fun places and events and off you go.

Create attraction and comfort before asking her out

If you want to know how to get a girl to say “I do”, know that you have to give her a reason to. And the most powerful reasons for her to date you is that she is attracted and comfortable with you.

Like most guys, you might think you can’t influence the amount of attraction women have for you. Yes, a pretty face and toned physique will turn heads – and yes, you should be stylishly dressed, clean and with a good haircut at all times – but physical appearance alone doesn’t seal the deal.

For best results with women, you must learn the art of creating attraction. You can achieve this by being externally focused, playing with women, and breaking the touch barrier. Tease her if she says something silly. Don’t be afraid to disagree with her or call her a “jerk” or a “nerd” in a playful way.

When women are in the presence of a guy who knows how to flirt confidently, they usually find themselves powerfully attracted and ready to date him at the drop of a hat.

It is also key to building comfort. If she doesn’t feel safe opening up to you, there’s no chance you’re going to go too far.

It’s easy to make girls comfortable around you. First, be sure to curb any nervous habits like shaking, stuttering, or looking away from her too much. Second, be sure to make an emotional connection when “relationship building”. If she tells a funny story from her childhood or mentions a frustration at work earlier in the day, show her that you can relate by sharing your own story.

Don’t get too deep into the emotional side of things – it’s important to balance the “flirting” and “relationship building” aspects of your conversation. It takes practice, but tapping into a girl’s playful and flirtatious side while building comfort and rapport is a winning strategy.

There you have it – three ways to increase your chances of getting girls to date you. If you want a girl to say “yes”, to invite instead of asking her out, know exactly where to take her and increase the attraction and comfort during the first conversation.

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